Pink Mold

We had pink mold on our shower curtain.

We still have pink mold along the caulking that seals the corner between the tub and the plastic wall thingy. Actually, I use the term 'seals' loosely, because the caulking is cracked all to hell, perhaps due to the pink mold. It's neon pink. There's stigmata on our walls from the 'hard' city water we have here in the 'burgh, but the stigmata is a rusty color. The mold is pink. I have a degree in engineering, and biology was always one of my weakest subjects, so although I find pink mold fascinating, I have no idea WHY it is pink mold, or more importantly, why it is growing in our bathroom.

Fortunately, it hasn't started growing on our new shower curtain yet.

It's actually so bright pink it looks like it belongs there, like it's a design cue for our bathroom.

NEXT ON PROJECT RUNWAY: make an outfit using only the pink-moldy caulking in Ben, Erin, and Ross's bathroom! GET ER DUNN!!!! (or whatever that dude says)

Shut up, my fiance watches it. So I do too.



We have a mouse in the apartment. I think I'm going to name him 'Hugh.' We tried to catch him with all these clap-trap 'humane' mousetraps I found on the internet but none worked.

1.) I rigged up a bunch of cardboard to make a ramp leading up to a garbage can. At the top of the ramp, I precariously balanced an empty toilet paper roll with a piece of cheese, some peanut butter, and a piece of popcorn at the very end. Ross wrote 'Cheese this way!!!' and drew an arrow pointing up the ramp in black magic marker.
The idea: mouse smells cheese, sees sign. Runs up ramp to eat cheese. Right when gets past the center of the toilet paper roll, he (or maybe she) goes tumbling into the bottom of the garbage can.
It didn't work. We tried different types of cheese, and everything, to no avail.

2.) A tray placed on the floor with an overturned cake pan supported by a bent shish-ka-bob stick above it. A piece of cheese is stuck on the end of the shish-ka-bob stick. Whenever the mouse runs and takes a bite of delicious cheese, the shish-ka-bob stick will fall, thus trapping the mouse.
It didn't work! We tried this for 3-4 days and nothing.

3.) A package of 6 mouse traps guaranteed by the Yinzer at Home Depot to 'Break those fuckers necks.'
In progress.

I feel really bad, because I was watching Star Trek: The Next Generation with my fiance a couple nights ago, and it was the episode where they caught a wayward Borg and nursed him back to life and all became attached to him so rather than using him to destroy the Borg they named him Hugh then let him rejoin the Collective, by his choice, which he had a hard time grasping the concept of, but then when he understood he had a choice, he said he'd rejoin the collective because it was too dangerous to stay on the ship and endanger everyone, especially Jordi. I think he liked Jordi a whole lot because everyone wants to be friends with a black dude. Seriously, even the Borg Hugh was like, man, it would be cool to be friends with a black dude, even if his other gig is Reading Rainbow.

So to make a long story short, I'm watching this show, and I felt really bad for Hugh, and I started thinking about our little mouse friend, who I decided to name Hugh, and how he's just trying to do his thing, like be a mouse, and hang out, and he's not evil, you know, individually, but, like the Borg, you know, collectively, we kinda assume he's an evil or some shit.

But the mouse traps are still out there with the peanut butter loaded in them, but a part of me is hoping that Hugh won't fall for it, will make a choice, and maybe run out in the parking lot and rejoin the collectively, or maybe just wind up getting eaten by one of those mean fucking alley cats out back.

Kids we picked on in high school

Its funny when you grow up and get out in the Real World and start to realize what a complete and total dick you were in high school. Well, at least I was. I think there were a few people who made it four ish years without tormenting some other poor soul but these were few and far between – there's always the random 'nice' popular kid, who doesn't fuck with anyone but is good looking/rich/tough enough where he/she doesn't get fucked with. Otherwise, the shit pretty much flows downhill and I spent four years at the bottom of the trash heap of the High School popularity hierarchy searching desperately for a milk crate to stand on, thus allowing the shit to trickle downward to some unlucky sap.

But I digress.

I was at work yesterday, CorpComm we'll say, when I overheard the new guy in my department talking about how his Ebay account got hacked and someone from China (???) sold a bunch of stuff through his account, like Thomas the Steam Engine books and shit, but actually delivered all the goods and wound up HELPING his seller rating.

As he's saying this, I have a mental image of Perch drunk off whiskey, firing a gun in the corner, laughing hysterically while selling ridiculous stuff through dude's ebay account.

Back story: A few weeks ago, I noticed a flier in my co-workers cube for new kid's band (you know you're getting old when you refer to those in their early twenties as 'kid'), playing a gig in my sorta hometown. I asked the new kid where he went, and he said (my high school.) Pound it and I asked him when he graduated. Asked him about family and I realized his older brother had been mercilessly tortured by a few of my younger friends. Actually, I thought my friends may have ruined his life, and I definitely encouraged this kind of behavior, especially since we were the (High School) Skate Mafia and he was a poseur.

I called Perch a few nights later and asked him if he knew dude's younger brother, the one I work with, and he laughed and told me a few instances of torment, the best (worst) of which involved throwing a shovelful of gnarly dirty snow in this kid's face. Damn, man.

I guess it's nice to see that as hard as we tried to ruin people's lives back then it didn't always work out.